


Everything in Between

by NeverBackDown001



Category: NCIS
Genre: Established Relationship, F/M, Major Spoilers, Major major spoilers, Sad with a Happy Ending, dont leave me kind of thing, post 18x09
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-10
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-16 17:56:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,210
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29953746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeverBackDown001/pseuds/NeverBackDown001
Summary: Sometimes what we got, is all we'll ever have.Major spoilers for 18x09(Winter Chill)
Relationships: Ellie Bishop/Nick Torres
Comments: 6
Kudos: 73





	1. Recite

**Author's Note:**

> lol the moment I finished the episode I started writing. Enjoy.

Nick Torres just listens to Vance recite the poem, the words flow in and out, he can't really listen to them, his gaze is fixated on the crappy, carpeted floor. Why do bad things happen to such good people? He wonders this more than he likes, more than often. Why do bad things happen to people who have given everything for the world, but the world gives them nothing but bad luck and death in return? 

He's given his everything, for the past twelve years. 

He's fought. 

Fought like a bitch, for his life, for a future. Because when he goes, he wants to have accomplished something. He can't just leave a fading mark. He wants to make a somewhat imprint on the thick history of the world.

But what has the world given in return, not that he's asking much anyways? 

No family? 

Well, he could count his sister and niece, his mother whom he visited when he got the chance. Returning home always brought a sour taste to his mouth that took weeks to fully wash down. Luckily his mother visited him more than he visited her. Lucia had been at Quantico for a whiie, Amanda was in college(he didn't know what she was studying but he knew that it was something she had a passion for and that was all that really could ever matter) 

Nick glances over at Ellie, sweet, beautiful Ellie who has a silent tear tracking it's way down her rosy cheeks, her long hair that had been pulled up in a pony tail, now lays flat along her shoulders, greenish gray eyes misty and pooling with more tears. She looks up at him, he knows that look. 

The look that means she going to break. 

Nick didn't know Emily Fornell very well, he had met her when she visited Gibbs, he had seen her when she was recovering from her first overdose, she was kind and pretty, sweet and smart. He didn't know her mother(Diane Sterling, which Bishop winked at McGee who blushed a rather red red, like the color of ripe tomatoes and said something about it only being a rumor) 

But how could she simply just be dead? Gone like the snap of a finger, gone like the shift of the breeze. 

He had seen more overdoeses, more relapses than anyone should. Growing up in the wild, mucky areas of North Miami, which was pretty much the hood, had been filled with junkies always offering him something in exchange for the greens in his wallet. No. His mother had steered him away from all of that, made sure he had good friends, good grades, a roof over his head and clothes on his back. 

It didn't help that he often went undercover with drug rings. Nothing enticed him towards drugs, nothing. He would wrinkle his brow and say 'not in the mood' and be done with it. No-one would question it. That was fine. 

But how could Emily Fornell simply be dead? 

And Tobias? 

Poor, poor man. 

When Nick was younger, the husband of the woman across the street had died from a car accident. Nick had only been ten and didn't know them very well, but missed his wave whenever he walked to school just down the block. The next day, his mother had forced him to help make a casserole. 

"A simple gesture, makes all the difference, mijo." His mama would smile at him, as he helped her chopped the onions and dice the carrots. 

No casserole(even his mothers) would make Tobias feel better. Nothing would. There would be an empty void in the mans heart for the rest of his life. Nick didn't know what to say, so he listened to Vance's poem. The one when his wife died? 

What was with everyone dying and leaving? Sweet Breena Palmer who had been Jimmy's soulmate had passed abruptly from COVID, a little over a month ago, leaving behind a daughter who Nick had met and enjoyed playing dollhouse with(that was a secret between him, Vicky and Jimmy). Jimmy, the positive lightbulb in the office of wonder had dimmed, but kept shining, not as bright, but still guiding them. 

Jack. A wonderful person who at first, he would admit, didn't trust. He didn't want a random person getting into his head and making him spill his secrets like they where lose. No. But he had warmed up to her and thought she was rather nice, a shoulder to lean on in times of need or whenever he went swan(which he felt like doing right now for some reason even if there was no-one to blame for Emily's sudden death). She had left him Carl, a fish(that felt like too much responsiblity) and without a goodbye. He would pretend it didn't hurt. 

Now Emily? Tobias's lifeline? An innocent girl who had an illness she had overcome but then succumbed to? It didn't feel right. Even if he had met her a handful of times in four years, he would miss her bright smiling face. 

McGee left soon after Vance and Palmer, smiling at a picture of his twins(which he had promised to watch next week, he was now dreading it because the two where a chaos of destruction). Nick remembered the McGee before he had kids, who had been, a tad more nerdy, but the Tim McGee now was this shining ray of sunshine that could not be dampened. His kids where his lifeline. 

What was his own lifeline? 

Glancing over at Ellie, who stared at her computer screen, her face devoid of any emotion, tapping at the keyboard aimlessly. 

There could be no way to make her feel a 100%, no, not today, probably not tomorrow or next week. He loved her and she needed that. 

He pulled the two corn on the cobs out of his desk, he had bought them when she wasn't looking, took two strides across the fifteen foot space between their desks and set them in front of her. She was such a foodie and he loved it, one of his favorite things about it. Okay, maybe not when she ate like a elephant, that could be gross, but he loved the way she was always, always hungry, and that she kept snacks in a lower drawer. Sometimes, when she wasn't around, him and Tim would restock it, and Tim would say that was what he and Tony used to do. 

A weak smile stretched across her lips as she looked up at him, her green eyes softening just a little.

She turned and hugged him. 

It was soft, inviting, warm, he was surprised at first, they rarely showed signs of affection at work, tried to keep it mimminal, sometimes a wink or flirty comment, but never hugs or kissed, holding hands or any of that. 

But today was a little different. 

He ran a hand through her soft curls. Ellie said nothing, did they need to say anything? Her arms where wrapped tight around his middle, like if she let go, she would fall, jer face buried into his shirt, eyes probably closed. 

Today and yesterday had been a whirlwind. The chasing down of foodtrucks, the call that Gibbs had received, getting the email saying he was now the proud parent of a type of fish he didn't even know of, and with a rather terrible name. 

But what stuck out the most was when they had visited Kosmic Korn. 

"This is my husband...Nick." Ellie had said to their suspect. 

Nick willed himself not to blush, like a little girl in romance movies, but his gaze shifted over to Ellie who paid him no attention. There was a million other things she could have introduced him as. 

Co-worker. 

Friend. 

Collegue. 

Random guy i know off the street. 

Boyfriend. 

A million things and husband came first to her mind? 

Not that he was complaining. 

But it had surprised him, making his guard stumble off course rather unexepectly. He had found it hard to focus the rest of the day. 

Did she...did she want to marry him? They had been together for a couple of months, and usually when a girl brought up the idea of marriage early, that was Nick's cue to bolt, because he wasn't ready for commitment, he couldn't buy a house with someone, have kids and raise a family in the suburbs? No. He would dump them and move on, feeling a little guilty but also relived. 

But with Ellie, the thought didn't scare him. Not in the slightest. Him not being scared, made him a little scared. If that made any sense. 

He could see a wedding ring on her finger, her last name probably hyphenated because she was stubborn, yet it was totally her. He could see a little girl as their own, maybe two, because the thought of raising a boy(who would inherit all of his bad traits, like being a total crack-head) was a little frightening. 

He could see it and it didn't scare him, didn't make him run all the way to Canada and back. 

Running a hand through her hair, jarring him from his thoughts and into the real world, he whispered. "We should probably get going." It was late and a hot shower and bed was calling his name. 

Ellie peeled herself away from him, gathered her things, as did he. As they walked into the elevator, she slipped her small, warm hand in his, still not saying a single word. Did they need words right now?

The car ride was silent, they had carpooled(more like she had been at his place last night and thought it was easier to take one car instead of two). 

And when they got into his little apartment, the only sound between them was their shoes slipping off, their bags hitting the floor and Ellie taking off her long coat and setting it on the brass rack beside the door. 

Her hand had been in his since they had gotten out of the car, squeezing it(it was going to go purple at this rate) and didn't dare move. 

"It's weird to think...she's gone." Ellie whispered roughly, breaking the heavy silence. 

"You guys where close." 

Ellie nodded. "Yeah. After Diane died, she was only thirteen, so she needed a female role in her life. Someone who would help her. I got her through her first boyfriend, first prom, first SAT's. She was like a sister to me and I never told her that." 

Nick held her chin in his other hand, tilting it up to meet him. "She knew. You where probably one of the few good things that came out of her mom's death." 

Ellie laughed bitterly. "It wasn't enough." 

"It was. Emily needed help, and in the end, she lost, but now, she's with her mom." 

Maybe that was what Ellie needed to hear, that in the end Emily was now happy, free of her burdens, free of pain and suffering and with her mother. She kissed him, lightly, on the lips, he could feel her smile against his lips. Weak, yet still a smile. 

"i love you," She whispered, in the dark of his apartment. A promise. One that couldn't be broken. 

"I love you too." He replied softly, kissing her once more. 

He loved her from the top of his head to his tippy toes and everything in between. 


	2. Part of You

Ellie knows that life is precious. She sees it everyday. She sees it through the eyes of the victim, through the eyes of the family of the victim, looking at the pictures on the screen in the bullpen. Going to see Jimmy, seeing the carved open body laying on the cool metal table, or going to the crime scene, seeing the stained blood on the carpet, walls or concrete floors. 

Life ends so quickly, like the snap of a finger. Ellie knows this. 

She remembers some of the worst times, the times she has inched so close to death, it's opened her eyes a little wider each time.

Vicious. Little Cody(probably the closest she has come to death) the sound of shattering dishware behind her, taking her a little less than a minute to realize her head hadb't been blow off and she wasn't dead. It had happened all so fast that it took her days to realize how close the bullet had come. She did measurements in her head. 

Three more inches to the left and Ellie would have been buried six feet under with a fresh gravestone over her. 

Only Nick had been there to comfort her. 

Then it's saving Morgan in the pond, diving in without another thought in her mind, the cold hurt her like a ton of bricks but she had to find Morgan, she had no choice. She had to save Morgan and if she didn't Ellie would drown right then and there. Bullets flew past her in the water, three, four, five until there was no more. She could see them wooshing through the lake, like tiny little darts. 

She has to find Morgan. 

Ellie probably repeated that thought fifteen times in her head until her hand found the small of her back, grabbing a fistful of her shirt and yanking her upwards, toward the light of the moon that is her guide to the surface. 

She hears Nick's yells, for her name, he finds her on the other side of the pond, trying to bring the woman back from the brink and she succeeds. Collapsing into the muddy ground, soaked to the bone in the chilly January air. trying to grasp every shot of oxygen she can. The pond water clings to her, droplets in her air, the warmth of Nick's jacket pressed around her shoulders as she watches Morgan being loaded into the ambulance. 

"You could have died, you know." Nick nudges her, his face pinched in worry. 

All Ellie can do is laugh bitterly. "Yeah I know. But that," She pointed to Morgan who was awake, alive, breathing. "Is worth it." 

Nick leaned into her side, his warmth comforting her. "You can keep the jacket, I don't want to be smelling like pond water." He grins, making Ellie break out into laughter that hurts her ribs. 

The next time she comes incredibly close to death is with Merriwether. His sinister laughter making her cringe as she wipes the blood from off her chin, staining her skin. She had to get out of there, or she would be loaded onto a plane, that was riddled with explosives. She had to get off or she would really be dead. 

So she fought. And maybe she wasn't just fighting for herself. Would she admit that to herself, probably not. 

Ellie fought for her life, and maybe something more. 

Limping out of the hanger, half-running half walking right into Nick's arms as she held her tight, gently but tight, his hand gripping her hair and asking with a soft tone if she was okay. No. She wasn't okay, not right then, but she would be. Soon. 

Merriwether had shaken her. It had shown her that this job was more dangerous than she led on. That sometimes she didn't appreciate the fact that she was good at playing it on the downlow. Maybe that was why she wanted to talk with Jack. Get it off her chest to someone who wouldn't judge her, who knew what kind of risks she took every day. 

And then she's standing on a pressure plate bomb in the jail of a refurbished sheriffs office a week later. 

How she got into these stupidly dangerous situations, with bombs, she didn't know but her luck wouldn't hold out long. 

And damn it, why did Nick have to be such a pansy, always asking her, always trying to protect her. She didn't need any damn protection, from him, she was fully capable with not burning her tongue on hot coffee. She was thankful(and little flustered) that he cared so much, but it didn't mean he had to be so hovery and doing all that man-crap.

She was glad he cared, because she cared about him too. So when she pushed him back, so he wouldn't chase after the Duncan boy, those little words. 

"i'm not okay with you getting blown up either." Is like a proclamation of love, without proclaiming their love. 

So when the bomb-squad disarms their bomb, a ton of bricks falling off her shoulders and chests, she's also glad Gibbs instructs Nick to take her home and make sure she doesn't have a concussion. 

Maybe her close calls are what they needed. 

Ellie knows life is precious when Emily Fornell is proclaimed dead, after over-dosing on a bunch of pills. 

It hits her right in the face, it doesn't seem real. She can't be just, gone. Not like that. Not when she was so close to beating her addiction, her illness. She had gone to her one month sobriety milestone, taken her out dancing after her six month. So incredibly close to a year, yet she relasped and just...died. 

Ellie had been there when Diane Sterling had died. Made sure Emily had a female role in her life because that was important for a teenager. Took her out shopping for her first prom dress, helped with her SAT's, been the big sister Emily needed. 

And she was gone. 

Ellie could have done something. 

But in her heart, she knows there was nothing she could have done. 

And when Nick takes her to his place, the ride there quiet, she makes a silent promise to herself. 

That Emily will always be remembered. In her heart, in her soul. 

The next morning she wakes with her legs and arms entwined with his, wearing one of his old t-shirts and a pair of shorts, one hand on his bare chest and the other pulling him flush to her on his bed. She loves waking up to him, watching him sleep with peace, his eyes fluttered closed, his breathing even. 

Ellie runs a hand through his soft hair, skimming over his beard and scuffle. She loves him so much. 

"You know it's kind of creepy to stare at someone when they sleep." Nick murmurs, making Ellie burst out laughing. 

"Technically, you weren't asleep." She reminds him, his soft brown eyes opening, dancing with amusement. 

"Technically you where awake before me." He shoots back, one hand snaking around her waist, his fingers skimming across her bare skin, making her shiver just slightly. 

Ellie rolls her eyes. "Okay, you win. But winner makes breakfast." 

Nick frowns and sits up a little, his face hovering above hers, her hair is fawned out beneath her on the pillow. He smells like woodsmoke and aftershave, not a bad combination. 

"Who decided that?" 

"Me." 

"You're the foodie." He groans. "You should make the food." 

Ellie wagged her finger childishly. "Foodies eat food, they don't cook." 

Nick sighs in defeat. "You win, but next time, you cook." 

She leans up and kisses him, sealing the deal as the warmth passes through her body, all the way down to her toes. "Deal." 


End file.
